LOST LOVE
by ULYFERAL
Summary: Sometimes you get a second chance at love as Commander Feral learns in this short fic.


**LOST LOVE**

Johnny Bluenote, a noted Jazz singer and composer, was visiting Megakat City for a charity event. As he checks in at his hotel he is mobbed by fans. Elsewhere in the hotel, the committee for the charity Bluenote was here for were just wrapping up and the members were taking their leave. Ms. Briggs and Commander Feral, two of the members, were headed for the lobby exit when the commotion at the check-in desk caught their attention.

Feral froze and stared. He hadn't paid attention to the entertainment lineup for the charity benefit so was shocked to see Johnny. It brought back memories he'd rather not deal with. Swallowing hard he made to continue on his way until a shout of recognition stopped him in his tracks. Ms. Briggs, curious, stopped as well. She saw Bluenote gently push away from his admiring crowd and head their way.

"It seems you are being paged, Commander." She observed glancing at him to see his reaction. She was surprised to see a flash of pain pass over the Commander's face before it returned to its usual professional mask. 'Had she imagined that look of anguish?' Something about the approaching singer had struck a nasty cord with the Chief Enforcer. This bore watching, she thought.

"Ulysses? It is you!" Bluenote said happily as he reached the Commander. "How are you?" The singer seemed uncertain whether to shake Feral's paw or hug so instead hung close and nervous. Callie found that surprising. Bluenote was well known for his warm personality and confidence so to see him uncertain and a little afraid to touch someone seemed wrong somehow. She waited to see how Feral would react.

"I didn't know you would be here. It's good to see you again." Feral said politely carefully hiding any other emotions he might be feeling.

"Yeah, well. My manager, Jeremy, thought it would be good publicity for me and I'd not been back here for a long time. Travel keeps me on the go. Umm, maybe we could take some time together to chat about the old days, catch up a little?" Bluenote asked hesitantly. It seemed he really wanted to see Feral but was uncertain of his welcome.

"I'm very busy, but I'll see if our times coincide while you're here. I won't make any promises." Feral said blandly still not showing any real emotion.

"Hey, that's cool! Hope it works out. Well, Jeremy is waving at me so I'd better go. Really good to see you again." Bluenote said trying to be upbeat but Callie could see a brief look of pain in his eyes as he quickly turned away and strode back to his waiting group.

"You and Johnny Bluenote were old friends, Commander?" Callie asked casually.

"Yes, a long time ago. If you'll excuse me Ms. Briggs I must be going." Feral said tightly and left as if his tail were on fire for the outside.

She stood there a moment longer watching the Commander disappear then glanced back at Bluenote's group as it headed toward the bank of elevators. Something had happened between the two that had ended on a bad note only it looked like an old sorrow rather than a feud of some kind. Her curiosity piqued, Callie continued on her way out of the hotel to her car. She decided to keep an eye on the pair while the singer was in town.

Reaching his hummer, Feral quickly climbed in, slipped into traffic and headed back to Enforcer Headquarters. Instead of concentrating on the report he'd left incomplete to attend the charity meeting, his mind was full of Johnny's beloved face. It had been ten years since he'd seen his old friend and lover and despite all this time the pain of seeing him was as intense as when he'd originally left. He was stupid to still be this upset and hurt but he'd never gotten over what he'd felt was betrayal. It seemed things had changed with Johnny and the singer sincerely wanted to see him but Feral didn't know if he could stand to be with Johnny again. Shaking himself angrily, he couldn't deal with this now. He shoved it to the back of his mind and focused on his work.

The charity concert was in three days time. Feral avoided Bluenote for one of those days, but couldn't stay away and so found himself at a small studio where Johnny was rehearsing and doing some recording. He had timed it so he would catch Johnny finished for the day. Using his Enforcer skills, he eased his way into the studio with no one spotting him and waited till the last of the crew had left before slipping into the now empty studio where only Johnny sat desultorily playing on a musical console.

Clearing his throat nervously, Feral took a seat not far from Johnny. The singer started in surprise and turned in his seat to stare at Feral.

"Hi, Bluey." Feral said quietly.

Johnny burst into a sad laugh, "I forgot you used to call me that."

While they were tentatively feeling each other out, Ms Briggs had also come to the studio to see Johnny. She ran into his manager, Jeremy, leaving and was able to ask where she could find the singer. Smiling, Jeremy said he would take her to him.

"Johnny likes a little time to himself after we finish working for the day so we go off to leave him a little private time something he rarely gets. Let's go into this observation area first. He can't see us and we can see if he is trying to write before we intrude." Jeremy was telling Callie as he led her into a one-way glass observation room that had a speaker on so that one could listen in without bothering the entertainer using the studio. They were both surprised to see Johnny was not alone.

"That's the kat he spoke to at the hotel. Who is he? Johnny wouldn't tell me." Jeremy said troubled.

"That's Commander Feral, Chief Enforcer of our city. He told me Johnnie and he were old friends but something must have happened between them because they were uneasy with each other when they met that day." Callie said in concern. "Let's just stay put and not interrupt. I have a feeling they have some important things to say to each other."

"You think so? Maybe we shouldn't be listening then but I've been kinda of worried about Johnny for a while. He's been unhappy and maybe I'll finally know why. I can't help him if he won't tell me what's been bothering him but you know, Ms. Briggs, I don't really think he'd be happy you hear what's going on?" Jeremy said upset and concerned about Johnny's privacy.

"Don't worry. I have no intention of telling anyone what I hear. I'm concerned for my Chief Enforcer. I sense this is very important to his well being as well. Anything that can shake up the Commander is cause for concern. He's just too important to our protection to have him less than up to par emotionally." Callie told him to soothe his conscious on their eavesdropping.

Still a little ill at ease, Jeremy nonetheless nodded his head in agreement and they both stayed quiet and listened to the events unfolding before them.

In a quiet voice, not really looking at Feral, Johnny said hesitantly, "I really thought you wouldn't see me and it hurt to realize that I truly deserved your hatred."

"I don't hate you, Bluey. I...could never do that." Feral said his voice thick with emotion. "You just hurt me so badly and I didn't know if I could bear you breezing through my life and leaving it again."

"God, I really did hurt you didn't I. I'm soo sorry. I was so stupid and young and so full of myself." He moaned hanging his head in anguish. "I really thought Tod was it. The center of my world as I raced to fame. Then it fell all apart when I found out the shit was robbing me of my reputation and money. By the time I wised up the creep had nearly ruined me. It took a year for me to recover only I didn't really recover. I think for the past four years I've just sleepwalked my way through life. My career didn't mean as much to me anymore." He explained miserably. "Still I never forgot you. The one kat who meant far too much to me."

"But you still left me." Feral said bitterly.

Johnny held his paws out pleadingly, "Please understand, Uly. I had to leave to make my name and you wanted to be an Enforcer and stay here. I truly thought it was for the best I go while I could. I knew you would have given up your dream to follow me and I couldn't let you do it so I cut our ties and tried to make Tod someone he wasn't."

"So you did it for my own good!" Feral stood up angrily.

"Oh no you don't! Aw that temper of yours!" Johnny said heatedly jumping to his feet too. "God I thought getting older would quiet that hair trigger of yours. Just listen you stubborn lug! Of course I didn't do it all for you. Only part of that is so very true but it was also a pleasant truth I used to justify leaving the only kat I truly loved more than life itself to make a career for myself. Well! I did it!" Johnny said throwing his arms in the air. "I'm famous. I've truly made a name for myself and cost me my soul in the process. I've never been happy. I missed you too much and it was starting to tear me apart. I never contacted you because I hoped somehow that you had moved on and found someone else and was finally happy. Forgive me for trying to let one of us be happy." Johnny said suddenly emotionally spent. He dropped back down on his chair and stared down at his paws..

His anger just as suddenly gone as well, Feral sat heavily and looked at Johnny miserably. "I have never been happy since you left. I just pushed it aside and went on but there was no joy in it. I became the best there was at my job but I never found anyone to share it with. My career became the center of my life and I pretended it was enough until I saw you again and remembered how it was."

Silence filled the room for a little while. Neither willing to say anything more. Jeremy and Callie were both feeling sorrow for the separated lovers and the pain they both had experienced. Each privately hoped the two could get past this.

Brushing his fingers over the keyboard, Johnny contemplated his life and how much more it could have been with this kat in it. 'Was it really too late?' He wondered. Not looking at Feral he said, "Uly? Do you believe in second chances?"

Blinking in surprise, Feral didn't answer right away. 'Did he? He still loved this kat, could it work now that they were older and maybe wiser? Could he risk being hurt again?' He wondered painfully. 'Or do you like being alone. No! I hate it!!' He cursed. Then he sighed and came to a decision he hoped he wouldn't regret later. "I don't know about second chances but I do know I hate being alone. Maybe I'm a fool for letting myself be hurt again but I'm unwilling to let you go again." He admitted

Johnny rolled his chair to Ulysses and grabbed him in a tight hug, burying his face in his beloved's neck. "Oh my love!" He moaned gratefully. They held each other for long minutes letting old hurts fade somewhat. It was a long ways to true reconciliation but it was a start and Johnny would take that and hold on tight.

The watchers felt relief perhaps things would work out after all. Jeremy knew a positive view would improve Johnny's recently somber music style and make it once more uplifting as it had been when he was had his peak. Callie thought perhaps this would help Feral be more open minded rather than so hide bound in his dealings with criminals, a certain pair of vigilantes and his own officers.

Relaxing his hold somewhat, Johnny pressed his forehead to the other kats. "You know what I want right now?" He asked.

"Hmm, what?" Ulysses asked golden eyes staring warmly into blue ones.

"I want to hear you sing Besame Mucho to me once more. I miss hearing that beautiful voice of yours. Will you?" Johnny asked pleadingly.

Pulling his head back, he looked askance at Johnny. "I haven't sang in decades and you know why." He snorted in annoyance.

"You still in the dog house with your family?" Johnny asked smiling in warm amusement.

"If you mean the cold shoulder I get on my rare occasions home? Yeah." Feral shrugged.

"Well, geez you can hardly blame them. You were, if I remember correctly, the best baritone the family had ever bred and you turned your back on it to become an enforcer. I also remember I was the only friend you had after that." He said shaking his head at his lover.

"Yeah" Feral sighed at the memory. "You were indeed. I was thoroughly shunned. It would be at least four years before anyone would speak to me again."

"That's rough, love, but I adore your voice and its only for me anyway, please sugar." Johnny begged.

Feral grimaced then sighed. "Alright, but my voice is crap now from no practice."

Happy now, Johnny turned his musical composer console on and warmed it up. "You roar to give commands so I've heard, so you've kept the volume quality up and you can never forget your training and because your talent is natural you can't get rusty." Johnny smirked and began playing the background for his lover.

Shaking his head, Feral sat up straight and began deep breathing then when his opening came he began in a heartbreakingly beautiful and romantic voice. In Italian, he sang a gorgeous love song.

In the observation room, Jeremy started in shock. "That voice! I've heard that voice before. I once caught Johnny in a depressed moment at home and he was playing tapes with that voice on it. I thought it was the most beautiful operatically trained voice I had ever heard and always wondered who the devil it was. Johnny would never tell me and I could never find it anywhere. Now I know why. Gods! No wonder his family was pissed. That commander of yours has the most incredible voice the industry would give good money for."

Callie just stared at Feral in amazement as glorious rich tones rolled out of the Commander's mouth. She watched Johnny stare at his lover with joy and pleasure as the last note sounded.

"Forget my ass. You're even more beautiful than when you were younger because now you have the full rich tones of an adult. Aww, Uly I've missed that wonderful voice so much. I completed that piece you and I sang before I left. Remember, it was the one I did that blended jazz and opera. It was a cool experiment that I never got to hear because I never wanted anyone but you to sing it with me. Let's do it now. I'm dying to hear it come together. Do you remember the words?" Johnny said excitedly as he set up his music board for the piece.

"Are you kidding that was, what?, ten years ago?" Feral looked at him in astonishment.

"No problem. Here let's go through the words then do it." Johnny said not taking no for an answer. Sighing in defeat, Feral mimicked Johnny as he led him through the song. They did it two times before Johnny signaled to do it for real. Starting the beat he gave Feral his opening. Feral sang in full rich tones the song Miserere, then Johnny joined in, their voices blending in a unique way. It was stunning and Jeremy was mesmerized. If it was the last thing he did, he would get these two to perform that song at the charity concert tomorrow night.

"That was even better than I dreamed it could be my love. Absolutely, beautiful! Thank you for doing it with me." Johnny sighed happily.

Feral smiled at his old lover and was actually pleased at the beauty of that song. "It did sound really good. Are we finished here? I haven't had anything to eat yet. Want to go somewhere and grab a bite?" He asked warmly.

"Oh yeah! Didn't realize I was hungry until you said that. Let me shut things down here and we'll go." Johnny said happier than he'd been in a very long while.

Jeremy felt it was time they left. Callie said what she needed to ask Johnny could wait till morning but that it was important she talk to him then. Jeremy promised to have him call and led Callie back out to the door. Callie handed him one of her business cards, thanked him, and left for home.

Feral took Johnny to a quiet, private place he knew where the singer wouldn't be bothered and they had an enjoyable meal together. They returned to Johnny's hotel room, no one was around as they passed through the living area for his chosen bedroom in the suite. Johnny closed the door. Johnny couldn't wait to touch the beloved form. He moved close and ran his paws up and down the impressive chest. Uly had changed his uniform into T-shirt and sweats. Johnny could feel every defined, hard muscle through the shirt.

"Damn, Uly, you are a brick house. I remember when you were just a tall weed with a puny chest. You hadn't yet grown into your body and were so wimpy. But look at you now! You are incredible!" Johnny's voice was getting deeper and huskier with desire. His old lover was a gorgeous powerhouse and he drooled to have him. He was getting hard just thinking about it. Uly had looked hot in his uniform but dressed as he was now he was even tastier.

Uly felt his mouth go dry and blushed at his lover's admiration of his body. The tender caresses were quite doing him in. He moaned and pulled his lover closer for a passionate kiss. Paws caressed, stroked, pinched and removed clothes. Naked they fell to the bed wrapped tightly together.

'Oh god, how much he'd missed this.' He moaned to himself. He'd been celibate since Johnny had left so his lover's touches were making him writhe and moan heatedly. The kisses burned and left his head spinning. He couldn't get enough and yet it was too much at the same time. The need so intense they barely started before they came suddenly. Despite that the need still drove them, their cocks still hard and demanding more. The bed didn't stand a chance as they rolled and twisted trying to feel every inch of each others body. The blankets and pillows slide to the floor as they explored every inch with tongues and fingers, coming again joyously and still it wasn't enough to sate their desire to fuse themselves into one, to take away the many years of loneliness and pain. Moaning frantically, Johnny climbed atop his lover and stared down into lust filled eyes.

"Let me have you, love!" He panted urgently.

"I've not been touched since you left." His lover warned.

"I'll be gentle. I'd never hurt you my love. Please! I need this! We need this!" Johnny begged.

"I could never say no to you, Bluey." Feral sighed already hot just from Johnny's body on his. He was willing for anything his lover wanted to do.

Smiling excitedly, Johnny reached for the tube of lube on the night stand and prepared his lover. Ulysses gasped as Johnny pressed one finger in and touched the spot inside of purest pleasure. He gradually added another then slowly another finger till Ulysses was begging him and bucking his hips his cock hard and weeping.

Removing his fingers he quickly lubed himself and eased into his lover, giving Ulysses time to adjust to him. Uly groaned and stiffened for a moment when it hurt. Johnny stilled, waited till Uly relaxed, then pushed in further until he was firmly seated. Uly pulled Johnny's face to him and they shared an intense kiss as Johnny began a slow rhythm that increased as the pleasure between them became stronger.

Outside the room, the rest of his band and manager, had returned from getting dinner. They were startled by the sounds coming from Johnny's room. Johnny never entertained anymore. He'd been fairly celibate for the past couple of years. Worried it was something else, Sarah, their female vocalist, reached for the door before Jeremy could tell them that maybe Johnny** was** with someone.

They were greeted by an incredibly sexy sight.

Johnny's beautiful, black furred body with the stunning white striped that ran down the middle of his back from head to tail could be seen atop a powerful looking dark brown tom who had his legs wrapped tightly around Johnny's back. Johnny was riding the tom hard into the mattress. The stranger had his claws dug into Johnny's back and was howling in heated pleasure and exhorting his lover to greater efforts. Johnny growled and moaned then leaned down to give heated kisses to his beloved.

Ulysses could feel the fire burning out of control, tingles of electricity ran from his toes to his head and getting stronger and stronger. He'd never felt so wonderful as Johnny continued to pound into him sending him higher and higher. Johnny cried out, "With me Uly, come with me!" Urging his lover over the edge. "Oh god Bluey" Ulysses screamed as he clenched tight and came feeling his lover's seed pour hotly into him at the same time. They shuddered together as ripples of pleasure washed over them for several seconds. Finally, they collapsed in a sweaty heap.

Recovering first, Johnny raised his head and began lovingly licking and grooming Uly's face. Golden eyes blinked open and stared dazedly at him. Chuckling, Johnny asked, "Are you alright my love?"

"Uh, hmm." Was all Ulysses could manage not really sensible yet. Johnny continued his ministrations. He was feeling such intense love for this huge tom kat beneath him that it brought tears to his eyes. Suddenly he was crying softly into the dark furred chest. Now more aware, Ulysses heard Johnny's tears and began a soothing caress of his back.

"Let it all out love, you'll feel much better." He said softly his own eyes glistening with unshed tears of relief and joy. Their lovemaking had been intense and emotionally draining. It would take some time for them to come down.

At the door, the watchers quietly backed up and closed the door. Sarah's eyes were awash with tears. The drummer, Danny, was shaking his head in amazement. "Who the heck is that with Johnny? Whoever he is has made him more happier than I've seen in a long time but I don't understand the tears."

"That's because he's an old flame. Johnny apparently knew him when they were kittens then Johnny began to chase his dream to be a singer and left Feral behind. Seems Feral held a torch for Johnny all these years waiting and hoping he would return. I saw them reconcile at the studio earlier today. Really glad to see them get back together again. It can only mean good things for this band." Jeremy said very pleased with the outcome in the bedroom.

"Ahh...that's so beautiful and sweet. Lost love found again. It'd make a cool song, don't you think?" Sarah gushed wiping the tears from her eyes.

"Betcha we don't see either of them till morning."Snickered the base player, Gerald.

"HeeHee! Man they about set fire to the sheets." Chortled Richey, multi-skilled instrumentalist and second vocalist for the band.

"Okay you juvenile delinquents, how about we all go to our rooms and get some rest for tomorrow and leave the two lovebirds some privacy?" Jeremy snorted as he shooed everyone off. As he walked toward his own room he glanced back at Johnny's shut door and smiled.

The concert the next night was a major hit and garnered considerable funds for the charity. Mayor Manx was very pleased. The height of the show was Bluenote doing a duet with Ulysses Feral. It brought the house down. It had taken some major persuading by Jeremy and begging by Johnny to convince Feral to even do it. The local news had a field day about the operatic Chief Enforcer. He was ragged unmercifully by his peers for months afterward and hounded by record producers to record his voice. Bluenote moved his recording studio and home to Megakat City and traveled less than he used to so he could be by his lover's side. Their love affair was fodder for the tabloids for many years to come.

_Epilog..._

"Be careful love, you aren't as young as you used to be you know!" Admonished the black furred male with the stunning stripe that was just showing touches of grey near his ears. Slightly stooped due to bending over a keyboard for too many years.

"Umph, don't worry so much about me. It isn't as if I'm harrying off after the bad guys physically anymore. I'm only a consultant now you know." Snorted a huge dark brown tom. Still powerful but moving a little slower due to arthritis. His once thick black hair thinner now with age.

Smiling warmly at his longtime lover, Johnny Bluenote pulled his taller companion down for a loving kiss before shooing him off to work. Smiling back tenderly, Retired Commander Ulysses Feral returned the kiss, gently caressing his lover's cheek in farewell as he left.

Life had been good to them over the years. Johnny still wrote songs and cut records though he never performed except for special charities. Feral consulted for the Enforcers where his niece Felina was the present Commander but he also sang duets with Johnny in the privacy of their comfortable home on the outskirts of the city and only rarely did he allow himself to be recorded with Johnny. They had made the most of their second chance at love and life was good.


End file.
